Sunday, October 31, 2010

Odd Picture

Farting, ha ha, around on the internet looking at pictures related to Waitress.  I come across this. Analyzing it, don't know what to make of it.

Who's being the pestery pest here?  Did he call her over- pestering her? Did she walk over pestering him? Is she just checking on him? She looks kinda pissed off.

I myself do that with my legs when i'm getting pissed and impatient with a customer. I'm thinking Grampa has all the time in the world and is harrassing her. Is he reading something from the paper to her?? I'm sure it's not a headline about how waitresses are way UNDERPAID!    

And look at the loser in the background sitting at the counter, probably staring at her ALL day. Get a life ... get a job,  loser, pest, ugh.                     

Saturday, October 30, 2010

I'll Pass for Now

I'm single, (super single right now)  have been, always.  I've had the long term relationships. Short term relationships.  Flings and One night Stands. Friends with benefits.

Those long terms did a real number on my heart.

Soo, had a little Halloween party last night, family. They stayed the night. I had to get up really early to go to work today. I had to step over them in the living room to get to the door.

I could see in the dark, my (grown) daughter and her boyfriend on the air mattress asleep... in the living room. And i could see they were spooning .... he had his arm around her. I thought Awwwwww..... how nice.

I thought back to the last time(s)  i was doing that...smiling to myself.... and i remembered.

On the way to work i was remembering. I was remembering the 'holding in my fart' and remembering how he didn't.  Remembering how when i turned to my other side... his mouth wide open. right. there.

Nah, i'll pass on that for now... so i can 'pass' in peace... for now.


Thursday, October 28, 2010


My God, My God, My God!!  Sheesh! It happens soooo often. At work, coffee shop. I'm waiting on a 'sit down' customer. And a customer comes in and goes to the 'take out' counter. IMMEDIATELY the body language ZOOMED right at me. Whole HEAD... EYES following me.

WON"T let go of the glaring.

It's a freaking coffee shop, i'm delivering a freaking coffee and a donut! Two minutes??!!  They act like they are standing there FOREVER!!

Okay!... i get there... Christ!!!

This one... idiot.... today.... soon as i approach. DOESN"T KNOW WHAT THE HELL THEY WANT!!!!!

Why are you standing there like a dope looking at me instead of looking at the showcase to see what you want??!!    WHY???

I DON"T go into Quiznos Sandwich Shop or Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream Shop and LOCK A STARE AT THE SALES PERSON if they are waiting on a customer before me!! I look at the STUFF to see what i want..... OR.... OR.... I KINDA KNOW WHAT I WANT BEFORE I GET THERE!!!

A LOT.... LOT of people do this. WHAT is the freaking matter with them??!!

Edit: HA! I just realized i ended post with "It's scary" So close to Halloween. No pun intended, lol.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010


Day off.    Wanted to write about Water Parks  today but got sidetracked. I made the HUGE mistake of  watching the NEWS instead of watching Golden Girls on Hallmark... like i have been.

Nothing but sad, sick news.  Police looking for some nut who killed a woman and stuffed her in a trash can behind his house. And that's horrible BUT this individual with an INFECTED brain suffocated a 3 year old little girl and her grandmother back in 1972... did 17 years and was set free.

Some good news. We are takimg BULLYING more seriously. The news is talking about that right now actually.

It's about GOTDAMN TIME!!!     FOR YEARS it BAFFLED me why was this allowed in schools??!!!!!

Monday, October 25, 2010

Waving your finger

One of the most disgusting and vile things you can do at a restaurant to your waiter or waitress is to wave your finger at them... to 'come here'

If you do, SHAME on you and may you develop a rash  'down there'  ...... 'down there' where you can wave your finger all you want.

EVERY place i have ever worked, over the YEARS i have seen this... done to me, or someone else.

But, i do see it less and less.  At least where i work, now.  Because about a year ago i let a few of the local regulars, the ones who hang around all day...   know how i feel about this.

One of them spoke up  "I think i do this"  genuine look of concern, she says she doesn't mean anything by it.  I realized later on.... she doesn't apologize, and she THINKS she does 'this'

Well, now she doesn't do it, but she will pick up that coffee cup, hold it in the air and tap her finger on the rim.

*Deep breath*

 She's lucky i don't have  telekenectisis powers and have that cup flip up and land upside down on top of her head.  I only say that because she is a sweet lady and i like her.

What the hell is so hard speaking up in a clear crisp voice... "May i have some coffee... please?"  There are REALLY  some locals who come in from time to time, have a cup or two or three with their donuts or kolache... sometimes i'm a little busy, they will catch me as i'm walking by and say just that... "May i have another cup of coffee please?"  Twenty,... thirty minutes TOPS... and they're on their way. HOW NICE. AND HOW NORMAL!

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Thank You

Yesterday, my Easy Day at work. Quiet afternoon at the coffee shop.  I've got two of the local regulars sitting down having coffee.  Another regular comes in.  I refill the two and bring a cup to the one that just came in.

Okay, anything else? No? Okay. Then drink and shut up.

I go back to stocking the cooler with drinks.

I know that the man who came in likes a refill in just a few minutes. First cup goes quick.  No problem....

I stock of few Cokes, couple minutes... i head towards the coffee, i'm sure he's ready for another cup.  I'm not a foot from grasping the coffee pot, he says.... "I'll have some coffee now"

I feel my right eyelid twitch....

Omg, you DECREPIT  fart.  YOU RECKON????  You reckon you'll have some coffee now?

WHAT??!  IN??  THE??  HELL??  DO??  YOU??  THINK??  I??   AM??  PICKING??  UP??
THIS???!  COFFEE???  POT????    ...   FOR???!!!!!!

I actually do say... "EXACTLY why i'm walking over here"... i have the coffee pot in my hand.  He mumbles 'oh'... yeah 'oh' ... just like the idiot at the bank who didn't want to wait in line, 'oh'

So, i pour him coffee "there ya go"    ANYONE with HALF a brain, naturally, human nature to say Thank You.  Thank You.  So simple. An automatic response.  Not for this dim-wit shit for brains. He mumbles Alllriiight.

He's LIVED all these years and learned to say Alllriiight  when someone pours him coffee.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Easy Day, Better Be

Yeah, easy day today, 6 hour work day. I got to sleep in late ....Awesome...Can't beat that walk in the park.

Only thing that can go wrong today is some asshole coming in 15 minutes before i close the shop... wants to sit down and have a donut, a regular customer WHO OUGHT TO KNOW BETTER!!
I have said it hundreds of times  "Better make it quick"

My patience is wearing thin with these MORONS.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Please Not Today

Getting up in the middle of the night, to get ready for work, i open up the coffee shop today. I'm  thinking of one particular customer I hope to God doesn't show his ass up FIRST thing this morning.

He is a sit down customer and a big yackety yak.  All i wanna do for the first hour is prepare for my 13 hour shift and wait on a few 'to go' customers.  I'm going to be very busy in the later morning.

I have to bring in the ice, set up the 'to go' and 'sit down' counters. I have to bring out the donuts and sandwiches the bakers have waiting for me...

The customer i'm thinking of comes in... 9 out of 10 times the SECOND we open. He has an hour before HE goes to work and thinks i am there to help him 'kill' that hour *grinding teeth*

Please... Pleeeeease... in the name of God... Not Today ... as i'm getting ready for work.

Driving to work, my eyes start to tear, grinding my teeth... Please Holy Father... Pleeease, i beg you, not today.

Get to work, dark outside, quiet... putting it in park... swear to GOD!!! GUESS WHO THE GOTDAMN IS PULLING IN!!!!!

C'MON!!!!  GOD!!!!

I'm ahead of him, i unlock the coffee shop door!! I am swearing OUT LOUD, the bakers are laughing... HERE HE COMES!!!  I practically jerk the chain off the OPEN sign, i'm SOOO pissed. I throw my purse into the cabinet... nearly flip the light switches off the wall  I don't care if he sees!!!

Here he is "Good morning, how are you?"
"Fine" i say... takes all i have to break a half ass smile.

"So how was your days off?"  SEEEE?  He wants to talk!!

All i wanna do RIGHT NOW is make... then HAVE some COFFEE and get my SHIT together. 

I just want him to sit down! Drink his damn coffee, read the paper and SHUT THE HELL UP!

I mumble "Fine"  again.

Just as i hit the 'Brew" on the coffee...he starts to tell me about the Roast he made last night.

OH MY GOD SHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm screaming in my head.

I don't acknowledge... i head to the kitchen, start bringing donuts and sandwiches out.

He's still talking, i barely hear what the hell he is saying. every few seconds i say... 'yeah'

He can't see that i'm FRICKEN BUSY?  SHUT THE HELL UP!!

He's talking to himself!!!!!!  HE's a gotdamn  IDIOT!!!!!!!

At this point i'm  PRAYING  another 'sit down' customer will come in... for him to torment.  And someone does....


Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Wait your turn dummy

We've all been to the Bank.  Yes, the Bank... once or twice... in our lives.  We kinda know we have to get in line and wait to be called on.

      I'm getting SUPER pissed thinking about this~

I have seen this many many times. But more recent- COUPLE MONTHS AGO.     Sometimes the bank isn't busy, sometimes i will be the only one in line...   IN LINE! where i am supposed to be. The teller is ready, calls me over "Good Morning..."

There are other tellers at their windows, working, doing something with papers and calculaters.... they look busy and they have a little closed sign.

Hear the Bank door open, here comes another customer, who doesn't think she needs to WAIT... GOES RIGHT UP TO A TELLER!!   A TELLER WHO IS OBVIOUSLY BUSY WITH!!  TA-DAH!!  A CLOSED SIGN!!!

            You Stupid Ass Bitch. WHO do you think you are?!

Needless to say, the teller stops doing her work, rolls her eyes... AND WALKS AWAY!!

I'm looking like .. GOOD!   The look on that idiot was priceless, she was like... "Oh' ...    I'm looking at her like yeah, oh, stupid.

And then she's coming towards me, looking into MY window to see 'how much longer.'   I'm thinking, does she want to get  RIGHT  behind me???


Deep down i wanted to tell her  " AARRGH! "

But all i said is "I think they want you to wait in line" ... and i gestured towards... the empty line.

I turn back towards my Teller, she's almost done with my SIMPLE transaction. She is softly shaking her head, i laugh quietly, she as well... hands me my receipt.... we both sigh..... "have a nice day..."

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Day Off

Relaxing, day off. Trying not to think of all the idiocy i have seen and heard of this past work week.

I kinda am looking forward in a couple days going to work... i have a crush on a guy that comes in every now and then. See, that's one of the benefits of being single.... you can date whoever you want. Granting they wanna date you  :)

I have had this crush on this guy for almost a year now.  He's been coming in little more than two years now... but i was involved with someone else at the time.  And now i am 'prowling' for him.

   Never seen him with a woman, i am assuming he's single.

And since i am working, i cannot  just, 'right up' ask him out.  He is not taking my subtle hints that i am interested. He seems extremely shy and i only catch  him for a few seconds every now and then.

Yes, every now and then... like a normal customer. He comes in every now and then, doesn't SIT in the restaurant EVERYDAY for hours pestering me. Comes to the take out, looks around for a couple of seconds tells me what he wants, i bring it, take the money... BIG SMILE... thank you very much have a good day!  NO IDIOCY IN THIS TRANSACTION!!

That's how it should be.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Go Home Already

Sorry, there's something wrong with people who sit in diners and coffee shops all day.  They hang out ALL day. They come and go thruout the WHOLE day.  Everyday.  They sit for hours. This is the afternoon shift. The bored,  depressed and the needy who got NOWHERE else to go..... but to pester me... me, who's trying to work.

I worked Bars too, day shift, they do that there too. Buy a beer, work on it for an hour... six hours... you get it. It's not the beer they want. They are lonely, pathetic. They want to pester me... me, who's trying to work.

I Love my career. I chose it so many years ago and been okay financially with it. IT works for ME, maybe not for everyone, but for me, so i don't encourage this to young people... go to college!!!!

At a dining restaurant, a beer joint or coffee shop.... Please just place your order without the narcissistic requests and chances are there will be nothing wrong with it. I am sooo happy to refill your drinks, maybe you'd like dessert? We can chat a little about whatever you might bring up....

Dine... timewise accordingly to the setting (diner, bar, coffee shop)  AND GET THE HELL OUT!!!!  DON"T COME BACK THAT SAME ASS DAY.... GO AWAY!!!  GOOD BYE, GOOD BYE, GOOD BYE!!!

 This is what normal people do. Thank you... THANK YOU normal people!!!  I DO love my job!!

Friday, October 15, 2010

Oh Enrique...

I'm kinda upset, with Enrique.... Iglesias.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm a big fan of Enrique's, have been for years.  But i'm a little perturbed with his new song ... I Like It.

Again, don't get me wrong. I love the song.  It's SUPER  fun, VERY popular at the moment.  BUT.... there are two lines... from the song.... i wish Enrique would of requested .... to be changed....

  My girlfriend's out of town, And i'm all alone.... Your boyfriend's on vacation and he doesn't have to know....

Oh Enrique.....  It's enough that everybody cheats on everybody already. Why encourage it in a kick ass dance song?

Sighhhhh.... Still luv ya Mr. Dreamy.

Thursday, October 14, 2010


Barely daybreak at the coffee shop. Customers coming in, one especially, in such a hurry (understandably so) at the take-out counter... but i am waiting on a sit down customer before him.  He is glaring at me, i gesture him, "one moment please'

Not a minute, watching my every step, staring, glaring...finally, approaching towards him "may i help you?" smiling i ask.  He looks relieved, he smiles 'yes'

He looks into the showcase of donuts ....  "Ummmmm....."

Ummmm.... he says. There's another customer coming up behind him.


He couldn't use the time he was FOLLOWING my every move to pick out what he wants for breakfast?!

As i said, i have been a waitress for 33 years. Even at tables, at a restaurant, when people are sitting looking at their menu's.... as a waitress you kinda can feel, read when a customer is ready to order, so you kinda nod  their way from your station, 'ready?'... and they nod, yes.

You get there and  "Ummmmm.... well...  hhmmm" And you stand there in disbelief.


When i go out to eat, i don't do that!!!!!  Not only do i NOT do THAT, i freaking don't make weird freaking requests with my meal either!!

I was in McDonalds one day, day of shopping, i didn't realize it was lunch time, so they were busy in there.  I simply ordered  "Fish Meal, With a Coke".... waiting for my order, i hear this dude ordering.... don't want this, don't want that on his.... some kind sandwich. AND ... AND... no salt on my fries he says!!

I about FELL over!!!   I wanted to tell him to take his freaking 'no salt' ass OUTTA HERE!  Stay the gotdamn hell home or pack your own difficult ass lunch YOURSELF!  Unfreakingbelievable.  :)

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Little about me

I am a waitress, have been for 33 years. At the moment i work at a coffee shop. 

I have been single all my life too.

Am a decent member of society, unless i'm out and had a Margarita too many, lol.  Always a designated driver or taxi cab around, by the way.

 I have chatted and hung out with  thousands of people, all walks of life... over the years.  I still do.

Someone once said, and it couldn't have been said better than this:

   You can argue that 20% of the general population is relatively healthy; 20% is relatively sick; and the other 60%, who all suffer from some type of  'neurotic misery' somewhere in the middle.... That applies to most people i meet.

Spot on.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

My thoughts of course duh

Eh, you live a little, you know things. I'm an ordinary woman... who knows... things.  Life's a bitch and then you become one. 

My blog is going to be about everyday things. Maybe something personal, maybe something i heard about or read about or saw. My intentions are even to be educational. As i said, i know things.

Whether readers think i'm pwoodee coo or pwoodee coo coo, i'm gonna have a lot of fun blogging about things that chap my ass.  Or touched my heart.

For now this is my Hello post. Hello!!!